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10 Tips to being A Good Friend When Someone Complains To Us

Complaining is the ordinary thing in life. Complaining is often because not easy to be grateful for. Also because of lack of initiative resolve a problem. But what if you must listen someone’s complain?

By: Mochamad Yusuf*

There is nothing in this world fit for a human. If during the hot weather, people complain. If the rain, also complained. If healthy, complained. When it hurts, indeed complain. No boyfriend complains, have a boyfriend still complains. And others.

Complaining is common in everyday life. Complaining is often because not easy to be grateful for. Also because of lack of initiative to solve a problem.

It’s all because of the positive energy is not out or even arrested. People like this clogging their positive energy with negative energy, such as laziness, boredom or reluctance.

As social beings, you may never complained by someone with a stack of complaints. Maybe you have heard from the spouse, children, siblings or our parents. May also co-workers, subordinates, superiors and neighbors. In fact, maybe we will hear complaints from new people we know. Like, a friend in the vehicle, in the market, in the waiting room or wherever.

Certainly as good friends, you can not refuse when they vent. Let’s face it they are. There are 10 tips that are useful when you deal with their complaints.

1. Chance to become a good friend.
No one human being apart from the problem. The difference is how they deal with it. There are creative, there are confused how to solve it. Moments like that, when they need a friend.

If someone want to vent to you, they will regard you as a good friend. Later they will return to help you. So now is the time you become a good friend.

2. Adds to the experience.
Every human being has own problems experienced. You might not have a health problem, but others may. Instead maybe you are experiencing financial problem, but others do not.

When vent, your opportunity to share experiences. With the experience they have, can enrich your experience, without having to have problems like theirs.

3. You should be proud, because you are deemed to be complete.
It sucks, listen to complaints. Because we ourselves may have a number of complaints which do not fail. However, do not trigger other people to ignore complaints.

Try asking him, why would someone complain to you? Is not that a sign that he believed in you. Should not we try to behave more wisely by paying attention to complaints that?

4. Watch and listen to complaints.
There must be something interesting behind dozens of complaints that flows from greeting someone. Of the thousands of complaints, there may be one of two that is true. There are indeed many complaints that could be forgotten. However, with attention to complaints of others hone your sensitivity to the feelings of others.

5. Learn to respect other people’s feelings.
Dealing with complaints of others by trying to appreciate their feelings. Not easy indeed to understand the feelings of others, but if you are sensitive enough you can grow your empathy towards them.

6. Do not pretend.
But do not pretend to pay attention. If you believe that their complaints should be noted, provide a genuine concern. Listen carefully, please reply to gaze into their eyes to show that you really pay attention. Do not pretend. Give a little touch to express the sincerity you.

7. Simply listen.
Occasionally someone complains, did not intend to seek advice. They just want to listen to. Prepare yourself for not giving advice. You never really know what happened and how to overcome them. Simply show that you understand their grievances.

8. Give encouragement and initiative.
But if you know what is really being faced by the complainer, and you know how best to deal with, it’s worth you giving advice. All this should aim to get rid of negative energy that clog the positive energy. However, we rarely actually really understand what happened. Just give suggestions and advice if requested.

9. Refuse? Why not…
You know you should pay attention to their complaints, but you do not have enough time. Try continue to receive complaints, but seriously say that you do not have time. Promises them free time where you can receive their complaints.

10. You do not need to replace complain…
If the complainer was only spend your time, then do not hesitate to say that you do not have time for that complaint. Indicate to whom he should complain of grievances. This is all you have to complain about, so that you can not complain afterwards. [TSA, 13/4/2010 night]

*Mochamad Yusuf is an online analyst, public speaker, radio host, lecturer and IT practitioner at SAM Design. Actively writing and his books have been published, “99 Jurus Sukses Mengembangkan Bisnis Lewat Internet”. You can follow his activities on his website, or in his Facebook.

4 Comments - Leave a Comment
  • Raphael Val -

    Hello, firstly, I would like to note that I think it’s a fantastic weblog you got here. My question is, I haven’t found out the way to add your web-site rss in my rss reader – where’s the link to the RSS? Thank you

  • Mochamad Yusuf -

    Sometimes in our minds, why should hard to help resolve their problem? Our problem is actually more severe. We should be harder to complain.

    However, sometimes by listening to complaints, there is the positive side. We so know, it could be a problem for others. In addition, we can be thankful. What is clear, we can be rewarding with a friend when he needed. Though we do often times, just sat quietly listening.

    So why not we do it?

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